Ask and You Shall (Not) Receive: Close Friends Prioritize Relational Signaling over Recipient Preferences in Their Gift Choices

Summary

Close givers sometimes depart from explicitly stated recipient preferences because they want their selection to demonstrate how well they know the recipient. In the study's registry setting, this behavior was particularly likely when the giver would receive credit for the choice. Ironically, more distant givers were often more willing to follow the registry and therefore selected something closer to the recipient's stated preference.

Key findings

• Across five studies, close givers sometimes departed from a recipient's explicitly stated preferences (e.g. a registry) to demonstrate how well they know the recipient.
• This relational-signaling behavior was particularly likely when the giver would receive credit for the choice.
• More distant givers were often more willing to follow the registry, ironically landing closer to the recipient's actual stated preference.

Themes

• Relationships & Social Signaling